Thursday, January 8, 2015

Eat Healthy Keep Moving but BE HAPPY

Great article:
  http://www.thehappygal.com/teach-daughters-love/

  I have been  thinking a lot lately about our society’s obsession with body image. I recently read an article about the Miss America pageant and how everyone was so excited that during the swimsuit contest, one contestant had a “normal” body. I had a couple of thoughts cross my mind. Why is it that we care so much about what our bodies look like, and why are we constantly comparing our bodies to each other? Another thought that came to my mind was, who defines what a normal body is? A lot of the chatter on twitter was about how happy everyone was that Miss Indiana had a normal body. Now let me say, that I can appreciate the fact that she had confidence and security in her own body, and that even though she was different than others, she stood strong in herself. I applaud that wholeheartedly. When I read all the tweets, and conversations about how others are too skinny, and not normal, my mothering instincts took over and I wondered, “how is this making those other contestants feel, to be told that THEIR bodies are not normal?” Will they now be discontent with their bodies and work on trying to gain weight, and muscle? Perhaps there are some of those girls who simply have body types that are more thin, and now they feel bad about themselves because they are not more curvy.

As a mother of four daughters, I am very aware of how much our society is obsessed with body image, and how it can be a big part of a girls self-esteem. Each of my daughters have a different body type. With all the girls in our family, we have curvy bodies, straight and thin bodies, athletic with larger muscles, and petite bodies. I have worked hard to teach my girls that each of their bodies have their own beauty and strength. I tell them not to compare to each other, but instead, to celebrate their own unique qualities, and we all celebrate that we have strong healthy bodies. (Learn more about the dangers of comparing HERE).

I haven’t always been so kind and loving to myself when it came to my own body. There were many years that I struggled with trying to get thinner, (even though I wasn’t overweight) and I was also constantly trying to make myself taller! At 5’4″, I felt like my legs were too short, and I was constantly wearing heels, or tall shoes to make me appear a few inches taller than I actually was. I became obsessed with working out, and constantly checking the scale to see if I was losing weight.  (For some thoughts on why you should throw out the scale, click HERE) Exercising became the most important thing in my day, and I wouldn’t be able to relax until I got it done each day. I was simply not happy, or content with how I looked. One day, I was spending some quiet time for myself, and suddenly I had a thought. My body is perfectly healthy. I am strong. I can run for miles, bike, and play with my kids. This is a gift I had been given from God, and so why was I not grateful for it? This hit me like a ton of bricks, and suddenly my perspective changed. I realized that I FELT amazing. And just like THIS quote says, I am enough. I suddenly knew that I needed to find better balance in my life and change my mindset about why I was working out and eating healthy. One of the things I always point out to my girls now is that it isn’t so important what our bodies look like, as how we feel. The reason I choose to eat healthy, and exercise and keep myself active is so that I can live my life without sickness, pain, and limitations that might come from not taking care of my body. I want to stay healthy so I can hike, ride bikes, travel, and essentially live my life! It is not because I want to “look” a certain way. And I love my body because it is perfect for me, not because it is “normal” by the world’s standards, because according to them, it isn’t.

It is all well and good when we can be comfortable with ourselves just the way we are, and to celebrate our bodies. I want to go back to my original thought. Why is it that we are so obsessed with our bodies and how they look? As women, we have so many gifts, and talents, and we bring so much value to this beautiful world. And guess what? We are so much deeper than what our bodies look like. When I think of each of my daughters and the immense talent and creativity they possess, I get so excited to think of what they can contribute to society. They are talented at writing, composing music, painting and drawing, singing, and dancing. They have hearts bigger than the sun, and they spend time serving others. They are amazing at creating delicious food, they listen to others, and help lift them. They love to use fashion and design to create cute outfits and express themselves. I could go on and on about all the value and goodness they possess. I use my daughters as an example, because I know them. But they represent every woman and girl. This is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the collective value we as women and girls bring to society. But what if we are so focused and obsessed with trying to obtain the perfect “normal” body, that we don’t have time to develop all these other beautiful and creative parts of ourselves.

What if we took all the time we spent on obsessing about what our bodies look like, and invested it in developing our creativity. What if we stopped comparing our bodies to each other and loved ourselves for who we are. When we love ourselves, we can begin to grow and develop.

I have a theory about why society is so obsessed with body image, and it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure it out. Think of how much money is made off of women trying to improve their bodies. I love this quote by Dr. Gail Dines,

“If tomorrow women woke up and decided they really liked their bodies, just think how many industries would go out of business.”

It’s no wonder that society makes a big push to tell you to improve your body! We are making them billions of dollars, as we buy products and services trying to fit the mold.

I know that my value as a woman is much deeper than the appearance of my body. I will remind myself of that every day, and I will continue to teach my daughters through example. For, if I can love myself for who I am, then hopefully, they will learn to love themselves for who they are. Together we can all live our best lives, and bring to this beautiful world, all the creative, and unique gifts we were meant to bring!

- See more at: http://www.thehappygal.com/teach-daughters-love/#sthash.1MJDBobo.dpuf

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